Why Beyoncé’s Naked Baby Bump Doesn’t Matter

It’s nearly impossible to not be inundated with Beyoncé news these days—her feminist statement at the VMAs this summer was truly epic, and her tour with husband Jay Z has been making headlines and sparking rumors of both a divorce (I hope not!) and of a new baby on the way for the couple (fingers crossed!).

Outside the whispers and speculation, the famous twosome gave their fans a big surprise during their On the Run tour, in the form of a very rare sneak peek into their private lives. Footage of the couple during Beyoncé’s pregnancy and the first moments of their daughter’s life were shown to cheers from fans—and nods from some gossip sites, saying that this footage of a nearly nude Beyoncé late in her pregnancy “disproves the speculation that she was ‘never’ pregnant with her baby girl.”

Am I the only one who gets upset when people get so preoccupied about how a baby came into this world—or think it’s any of their business in the first place? “Was it a natural birth?” “I bet that bump was fake.” “She had a surrogate.” “I heard she used IVF.” “That kid must have been adopted.” “I heard she had to get a donor egg.” These kinds of judgmental whispers make me furious. What does any of it matter, as long as the child is healthy, mom is healthy, and the whole family is happy? Why did Hollywood Life, the gossip blog that reported on the footage of pregnant Beyoncé, feel the need to say, “Good for you, Bey!” after saying that she’s disproved the rumors that she used a surrogate?

Carrying a child is a wonderful experience, and I’m happy for Beyonce that she was able to have that with Blue Ivy, but it in no way makes her motherhood more legitimate than someone who did use a surrogate, or someone who adopted (and I’m thinking she’d agree with me, too— Beyoncé seems like a pretty cool, enlightened chick!).

Our society’s obsession with who’s the real mom drives me insane. Was one of my children possibly conceived with some help from an IVF cycle? Maybe, but we’ll never know for sure, and it doesn’t matter. Every child is a miracle, no matter how they were brought into their family, and any child’s real mom is the woman who tucks them in at night, who thinks about them first thing when she wakes up, last thing before bed, and pretty much every moment in between. A child’s real mom is the woman who loves him or her unconditionally and is excited to show them the world while also wanting to shield them from some of the more frightening things out there.