Kids + Violence on TV = A Lot of Big Questions

Kids + Violence on TV = A Lot of Big Questions

The other day, I went to turn on the TV so my littlest ones could watch Disney Junior, but what popped up on the screen wasn’t Doc McStuffins and her crew. I guess the last thing Daron or I had watched was the news, so when it came on, there were images of burning police cars and rioting in Baltimore. My girls were obviously confused and scared and wanted to know why a police car would be burning and why everyone seemed so angry. Such a simple question, but figuring out what to answer it with was way trickier.

I want my children to grow up feeling safe, and have that universal Mama Bear instinct to keep them safe from the harsh realities of today’s world. So on one hand, I want to completely shield them from the violence and injustices that are happening in our country. But on the other hand, I recognize that there are little ones the same ages as my children growing up in communities like Baltimore. Children who are confronted with scary truths around profiling, discrimination, and general violence on a regular basis. And in those communities, there are parents who have to explain these situations to their children in very clear terms just to keep them safe, out of prison, and alive. I can’t imagine what it must be like to be in those mothers’ shoes, and my heart goes out to them. I understand how privileged I am to live where I do and to have the life I lead, and know that not everyone is so fortunate. I wish we could say everyone is equal in this country, but it’s obvious we’re still not there.

Anyway, there I was in my living room, and even though I’d quickly changed the channel from the violence on TV, looking down into my daughter’s frightened eyes, I knew I had to say something. First, I told her that she was safe and that I wouldn’t let anything bad happen to her. Then I explained that although we live in a town where we are treated nicely, there are other places in the country where things have gone wrong and people are very upset because they haven’t been treated nicely. Some of those people are doing bad things because they’re so angry, but way more of the people are just trying to change things and make them better for everyone.

Is that vague? Yes. Is it also true? Yes. I don’t want to lie to my children—it’s something that I think sets a very bad example and is damaging overall; but I also don’t think a two year old is capable of processing issues surrounding institutional racism and police relations. How would you have handled this situation? Would you have given your kids more details? Would you have brushed it off as a pretend TV show that was “nothing to worry about?” Tell me how you handle it when your little ones see violence on TV—we can all learn from each other.